I hate the title of this. I unfortunately have to have a title before I can begin writing anything. It's something that basically crushed me in high school because all of my English teachers wanted good titles for our papers. That was something I was never good at, so I would struggle with the title for hours and never have any work done on my paper. The due date would arrive and I would have nothing to turn in because I was never able to get past the fact that I'm really bad at coming up with titles. As one might assume I did not get the best grades in high school, but it's getting better.
That's all really irrelevant, but I am unhappy with my title.
I have a friend who occasionally gets philosophical and talks about life being about the journey as opposed to the destination. So that's where I got my lame title.
Lately I've been thinking about that in poker. Am I playing for the journey (the actual time I spend playing) or for money I can make in the end (the destination). I think I really play for the destination 95% of the time. I have a goal for what I can acheive in the end. I want x amount of money or I want to reach a certain milestone or I need to win a tournament.
It's not that I just want to sit around and have fun playing a game of cards. I feel lazy when I play less than 6 tables most of the time. I still have fun playing the game. I don't just sit down start clicking and become miserable, but I don't know if I play in a healthy way. I want to get back to the feeling I got when I was learning poker, the joy and excitement that brought to me.
...but it sure will be hard to hit Supernova with that attitude.